I have this pattern,
I've noticed
of avoiding
that which i desire
that which i genuinely crave to do, be, master and accomplish
with every trick in the book:
over-thinking, fear, being "too busy," drugs, sex, alcohol, fancy parties, fantasies...
always involved on the periphery
of what I truly want to be doing,
of living my ideal experience.
life is slowing down
for a moment only
and i have time
to wonder
what would happen
if one devoted oneself
fully.
a Reverend once asked in a sermon
what would life be like
if for one year
one year
we devoted our actions
to God?
what then?
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